M A S T E R P I E C E

That might be,
The biggest paradox of all,
We learn to hate on people that love their selves,
When we should be taught how to love ourselves,
I grew up thinking I had to be perfect,
That I was merely a piece of a puzzle,
One day to be completed...
Now I've spend years trying to figure out,
What kind of puzzle what piece?
 A corner one, some that sticks in the middle?
Only to try and find the one thing that would complete me,
Funny thing is, the one thing that can complete me,
Is me, the love I feel for myself.
See the moment I accept myself as I am,
I feel love, even for the parts of me that aren't to be laid out in store,
It is in that moment that you become whole,
And in that moment as well you become so relentlessly attractive,
That not puzzles but frames seem to fall at your feet,
It was never anyone's intention to fall for a devided girl,
They wanted a work of art,
Little did I knew I wasn't just any piece,
But the masterpiece.

I wanted to live a life worth writing about,
Little did I knew,
I already was.

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Idiot, I love you.

I like when you meet someone for the first time,
And it's not what you thought it would be, 
I like it when it's awkward, 
And more then anything I love it,
When he stumbles and stuttered with every word he said, 
Every step he took... 
Cause that's real, 
That's a natural sense of self. 
It meant I ment something. 
Cause you only stumble, 
Stutter and crumble for someone worth the idiocy... 
Not loving that, 
That would be real foolishness.

If you are lucky enough to find a weirdo,
Never let them go.

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Weapons

It where not words anymore,
The sounds he made,
Where alarm bells ringing.

It where not words anymore,
Thy where bombshells,
Falling to the ground,
As spoken out.

It where not words anymore,
Yet knifes, and guns,
Shooting and stabbing,
Me down to the ground.

It where not words anymore,
But weapons.

Words are not words,
Weapons are not weapons,
Everything is nothing,
Until we choose,
For them to be.

Words are weapons,
Of mass destruction,
And mass love...
Choose wisely.

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Broken bounds.

Lines are drawn,
For reasons,
You can pass,
My line,
Once,
Yet never again.

Rules are made,
For guiding,
You can stray,
This moment,
Now,
Yet never again.

Bounds are sacred,
By value,
You can break,
My trust,
Once,
Yet never again.

Will we be,
Friends,
Never again.

Moral is build,
To count,
Both ways,
Not merely,
Mine,
You're aught to,
As well.

Yet never again.

Never.

The thing is that you knew.
And still you chose,
To hurt me. 

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"Whens"

The mirror's image,
Shows that I've reached,
The age of "whens",
When I would imagine myself,
Going to travel the world,
Graduating,
Having built up a life,
To leave behind,
When I'd sneak out,
To go and seek,
Purpose in this world,
In a country,
I've never heard of before,
Send back home,
A dvd of my wedding,
With the people,
Now my family,
That my roots,
Haven't ever met,
Yet here I am,
Staring at the mirror,
For I am still here,
Yet there is no need,
To run, to hide,
For I've already,
Vanished.

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Killing me slowly

There's a room inside your heart,
Seal the locks and play the part,
Let no emotions get anywhere near,
Just slowly disappear...

For every mistake that I make,
Must also be the forsake,
Of everything I'm yet to be,
Let's now all punish me,
For inflicting this problem to the main,
To realise the burden of my pain...

Seems that caring out,
The shouting void,
Is not approved by any of thy,
There lays the lack of me,
Nothing left to give,
Nothing left to lose,
I drink away whatever to choose...

The only friend left,
Is one nearly as dark as theft,
Steals like a thief,
Away all your grief,
Oh my dear oblivion...

There's a room inside my heart,
I'd shut it tight and play the part,
Tried not to let emotions near,
But not killing myself...
Is slowly killing me, my dear.

Nearly drank myself to death,
Realising that I don't wanne die,
But I don't really want to live...
Either.

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Cotton Candy

I see thy laugh,
Trough the clouds,
Smiling,
As I jump,
On the pink,
Floating pillow,
That flies me,
Into your arm,
Come on love,
I am yours,
I see thy eyes,
Are a thousand,
Stars shimmering,
In the darkest night,
I am falling,
Laughing as a child,
Trying to taste,
The cotton candy,
Before I am forced,
To stand my ground,
Won't you catch me?

If all the cotton candy is gone will you promise,
Not to forget me?

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Sunday to Monday

As I walked in,
Made my way,
Back to the place,
That once was,
My seat,
My home,
Thy all welcomed me,
In such a way,
That I knew once again,
What I had missed when,
I forgot why,
I went every week,
For I can see now,
It has nothing to do,
With you, with him,
With anyone there,
Merely with me,
For I like to be,
In the mids of this brown,
Warm and corny place,
Getting myself intoxicated,
On other people's breath,
And being killed by,
Their exhale of smoke and sad stories,
That I long to have,
Lingering on my skin,
Only so the next morning as I wake,
I can forsake,
That today will be,
The day to come.

May your coffee be strong and your Monday be shot.

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Fall Fall Fall

You'll be right there when I fall,
You'll be standing there,
Waiting,
Arms open,
You'll be right there when I fall,
You'll be holding me,
Close,
To the heart,
That carries me,
When ever I fall,
If you come around,
Cause I will,
Fall,
For you,
And,
You'll be right there when I fall,
You'll be right there when I fall,
Holding my heart,
In your hands.

I'm in repair,
I'm not together but I'm getting there.

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Emotions are rarely tidy.

For a thousand years,
We talked,
About all these things,
That just don't make sense,
In these lifes we live,
Once we finished,
He said to me,
"Guess that just it,
I sing and compose,
When you write your prose,
All to give this world,
These emotions running,
Away with every thought,
You owned,
A place to stay,
Outside of our bodies..."
And that was it,
Literally,
All it is,
For a thousand years,
We talked,
When silence ended,
Our conversation.

Creative minds are rarely tidy...

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I'll breathe again

The thing about life is,
So I discovered,
That the cure for the poison,
Lays within te decease,
The truth lays within the lies,
Even strengt or over coming,
Lays within the fear,
Fear of rejection, of imperfection,
Even the fear of the unknown,
It's all in the things,
That hurt us most,
Where lays our salvation as well,
In the moments that break us,
Into infinte pieces,
Says not solely that we are broken,
It whispers that there are,
Infinite ways to try and puzzle,
Who we want to be,
We can not be broken,
For we can not be whole either,
How can someone that has not yet,
Lived their entire life yet,
Be whole? It's not possible,
For you had not lived a whole life,
We are all uncompleted messes,
Within that lays that there is not a soul,
To succeed or to fail,
For we are all just passing trough,
Without ever finishing,
Until we'll be born again.

Collapse, crumble, this is not your destruction,
This is your birth. 

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Pour me down.

Tears,
All she saw,
The only thing,
Clouding her view,
Tears,
Streaming,
From her cheeks,
As waterdrops,
On the window,
Cleaning so light,
Can shine trough,
Yet light did not come,
Only darkness surrounded,
When she closed,
Her eye lids,
Once again,
Only to release,
The last of her tears.

Sad people love the rain,
Because,
They are no longer crying alone.

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LBD

What a mess,

The comments,

About the,

Little black dress,

Not only,

Was it loved,

It was also,

Cursed,

By thy who think,

I must be brought,

To sink,

Only for,

I had worn,

Tight in light,

Of day,

Night didn't fall,

When black was it all. 

I am not the skin I live in,
I am only a visitor there,
The soul that lives within,
Is what matters most,
And it does not forget who she is. 

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Blonde and Brunette.

We are the way our hair was,
Hers was so spontainious,
Curled as the flow,
She went trough life with,
Golden as she made,
The one's she touched feel,
Falling perfectly,
In between everything,
All the other atoms of the world,
Where she was tied up,
Or in a fuzz,
Still always in the moment,
Living in the now,
When my hair,
Was straight,
Trying to follow the rules,
Stay in the lines,
Not ever even knowing,
There was a flow to try,
And follow with,
Always goofy when I needed,
It to be smooth, or the other way around,
Never as the way I was feeling,
Only for,
I never was in the moment,
Living it myself,
When we met,
She started to teach me,
All these traits of hers,
And the other way around,
Now both of us,
Have ripply hair,
Right in place,
As it is supposed to be,
Balanced.

Every brunette needs a blonde and the other way around. 

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Freedom writer

Never had I even known,
This desire I have,
The love I feel,
For all that's wrote,
And all to be written,
I long more for a pen,
Scrabbling across paper,
That I wish for,
Your fingertips on my skin,
Never had I guessed,
Ever in life I could find,
Something to love more,
Then you,
Yet when I found words,
When I fell for poetry,
I found that what I felt,
Was not close to love,
Merely a flirt,
When I am infatuated,
With the smell of,
Old books and paper towns,
With places that only exist,
Inside my head,
I am in love,
With every letter,
I seem to forget,
How to spell your name.

I can feel you forgetting me, but it doesn't matter,
For I no longer remember your name. 

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Options

Strange enough,

I never wondered,

What it would be like,

If he where mine,

See the thing is,

If I ever did think of him,

As this,

He would be only,

An option,

In a sea filled,

With choices I'd rather make,

Until there is nothing left,

But bad decicions at shore,

Stranded next to me,

Burried beneath the sand,

The girl you wanted to make yours,

Only her hand above the strand,

Would you pull her up?

Once she treathed you as,

Just an option? 

If you think in options, you'll feel stuck.

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Status vs. Satisfaction.

She hardly ever wanted much,
Her desires contained,
To love and be loved in return,
Have a place on this world,
To call her home,
A family to share it with,
And a purpose to serve,
Whilst she found it all,
One could easily forget,
What it has rather then,
What more could be wished for,
Yet never did she,
Expected more from life,
Then happiness, love and fulfillment,
That there might be,
The greatest succes of all,
Knowing how blessed we are,
Funny thing being,
I can not name anyone,
Quite like her...
Rather then having a status,
She only wanted to be satisfied,
With what is, was and will be,
So she was.

I love you mommy, happy b-day! XOXO

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Nothing at all.

The worst of it all,
Was nit when it hurt,
It was not the pain,
Or the sadness,
Not anything of these things at all,
The worst was not a feeling,
The worst was nothing at all,
Nothing was worst,
I was numb,
Out of touch,
Unable to discover,
If I am still alive,
Or already dead,
I am neither,
I am nothing,
And nothing is the worst,
Cause in the end,
We'd all rather feel pain,
Then really nothing at all.

Never have I dealt with anything,
More difficult then my own soul.

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Burning herself up.

She had this extraordinary fear,
Of not fitting into the world,
Of failing it,
Being unable to establish,
The right of existence,
Not making something of her life,
Being insignificant,
Not making a name for herself,
Having no meaning,
Or not having served a greater cause,
So ironic,
That just these fears,
Where the only things,
Keeping her,
From being it all,
See she searched for it all,
Signs, moments and epiphanies,
When in fact,
She was the sign for only so many,
She was the moment for me,
And she was the epiphany,
For everyone on her way,
She just did not saw it herself,
Sad girl, so busy,
Trying to earn the right to be alive,
When all that does,
Is keep you from living,
We get the right we are born,
Sad girl, burning up herself,
In her search for light...

Sad girl, Burning up herself,
In her search for light,
Never knowing...

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Melted to tears.

Frozen,
Inside,
This heat,
Rising up,
Faster,
Then the anger,
Hotter,
Then the hell,
I wish to you,
Melted,
My heart,
So cold,
Turned it,
Into tears,
Unable to be,
Stopped,
Before,
Falling to the ground,
In that moment,
I left my sorrow,
There,
Tomorrow,
Another day,
It will be easy,
To say,
Then,
Now that I feel,
So light,
Alive,
That I have,
Let it go,
My heart,
Finally beats.

No longer do I stand,
Watching from the outside in,
These walls have melted.

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Will.

Look how far I've come,
I'd long to scream it,
From the tops of the mountains,
You forced me to climb,
Without anything else,
Then my naked self,
Look how far I've come,
Despite,
Of you,
Despite,
Of you,
Trying to pull me down,
Kicking me when I've fallen,
Filling my ears with doubt,
Despite of you,
Forcing me to drag you with me,
Demanding to hurt me,
To kill the good left in my soul,
Look how far I've come,
When all you ever tried,
Was to keep me in the same place,
Now you stand there,
Paralysed,
For I have rised,
Up the hill until,
I'm on top of the world,
Screaming,
Look how far I've come,
When your life hasn't even begon.

Look how far you've come, be proud, love yourself,
It is not a crime, To look in the mirror,
And smile at what it beholds.

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Tomorrow day.

You can't stay,

Tomorrow day,

Time is too short,

Hurry not to,

Get caught,

up on this,

Lie we seem to find,

So white,

Yet filled with pride,

Sneaking trough,

The tiniest wholes,

Between my teeth,

Fooling you into,

Staying here,

Yet you won't see,

The light of day,

You can't stay,

Tomorrow day.

I know you can not stay tomorrow day, but that does not say
anything about tonight does it?

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Like I do.

Surely,
They are all,
Extraordinary,
Beautiful,
Smart,
Brave,
And everything,
You wanted them,
To be,
But tell me,
Honestly,
Would they do anything?
For you,
To make sure,
You know,
Your...
Loved,
Beautiful,
Miraculeus,
I'm sure,
They're all wonderful,
But would they write,
A million poems,
For you?

Would she write till her fingers bleed?
Only to fill the sheet,
With all the things she loves,
About you... Like I do?

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I'm so vain.

Vanity,
In me,
Desires to be,
The savior,
Of thy,
To hear,
The tone,
In your voice,
When you'd,
Beg me,
To teach,
To preach,
To you,
Everything,
Your aught,
To do,
Vanity,
In me,
How can I be,
Like thy?
How could I,
Turn out,
So,
Vain...

This vanity in me, Oh can you see,
I am becoming thy...

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Skies.

"Then why would you trust me?"
He asked me,
Funny thing is,
I never even doubted about,
Trusting him,
With the darkest thought,
Revolving around,
Not because he is trustworthy,
For I can not tell,
Only because I am so sure,
That he is one of few,
That does not judge,
See he has a piece inside his soul,
I recognise as my own,
One that whispers,
At every story told,
"Imagine, what it would take for you,
To think like this? To act like this?
To walk a mile in their shoes...?"
That's just is,
I did not trusted him,
More or less then the lion,
Waiting for me,
To hand him food for thought,
Mellow yellow thoughts,
He sparks when he talks,
In metaphors and round-a-bouts,
When roaring red is the theme,
The louring lion let's lingering on me,
I ask myself so desperately,
To beg you to come on over,
And paint the sky in my mind,
Light blue,
Cause the only one I'd trust,
With my glass heart and a hammer,
Rather then me is you.

Skies are crying, come here,
For I am dying, to meet you again,
Ease my mind, as you did then.